Has Everyone Forgotten How to Date? (And How to Actually Meet People in 2025)
- Arlyn Parker
- 3 days ago
- 3 min read
Dating today feels... different.Ghosting is the norm. Effort is rare. And finding someone who’s genuinely interested in connection? That feels like a miracle.
If you’ve ever caught yourself wondering, “Has everyone just forgotten how to date?”—you’re not alone.
The way we date has changed faster than most of us can keep up. Meeting people at bars or through mutual friends has been replaced by apps, algorithms, and endless swiping. Sure, it’s easier to meet people than ever before—but it’s also never been harder to build something real.
As relationship expert Esther Perel puts it, online dating has turned people into “products” we scroll through. That mindset makes it tough to invest in someone when there’s always another “option” waiting one swipe away.
So, how do you navigate this messy modern dating world without losing your mind—or your standards? More importantly, where do you actually meet people in 2025?
Here’s your guide.
1. Set Your Standards—and Stick to Them
If you want real effort and consistency, don’t settle for less. The right person will match your energy—not make you question it. It’s easy to lower your standards when dating gets exhausting, but in the long run, that only leads to more frustration and confusion.
2. Don’t Play the ‘Cool’ Game
Pretending not to care? Exhausting. If you like someone, show it. Vulnerability is refreshing in a world full of mixed signals. As Esther Perel says, “Vulnerability is the cornerstone of intimacy.” If someone isn’t receptive to your honesty, they’re not your person.
3. Be Upfront About What You Want
Looking for a relationship? Say that. Open to something casual? Be clear. Being upfront early saves you from wasting time on people who aren’t aligned with you. And if someone pulls away after hearing what you want, good—that’s clarity, not rejection.
4. How to Meet People in 2025 (Without Using Dating Apps)
Apps aren’t the only way to find love (or even a good date). Here are a few modern alternatives:
Interest-Based Events: Book clubs, cooking classes, running groups, trivia nights—you name it.
Professional Networking: Relationships often form through shared industries or projects.
Travel & Tours: Group travel introduces you to adventurous, like-minded people.
Fitness Communities: Group workouts or running clubs are low-pressure ways to connect.
Volunteering: Doing good = meeting good people.
Matchmakers & Friend Intros: Don’t be afraid to ask for a set-up. Sometimes your people know your people.
5. Call Out Bad Behavior
Ghosting, breadcrumbing, hot-and-cold games—don’t make excuses for it. Call it out (even if just to yourself) and move on. Esther Perel reminds us that real connection requires curiosity and presence—not avoidance.
6. Keep Dating Fun, Not a Chore
If dating feels like a second job, it’s time for a break. Refocus on yourself, refill your energy, and return to dating only when it feels right. The best connections often happen when you’re not chasing them.
7. There Are People Who Still Know How to Date
Not everyone is emotionally unavailable or playing games. There are people who still value effort, communication, and connection. You just have to sort through the noise to find them—and when you do, it’s worth it.
Final Thoughts
Modern dating comes with its fair share of chaos. But it’s not hopeless.
Set your boundaries. Stick to your standards. And most importantly, don’t let a broken system make you feel like you’re asking for too much.
Because you’re not. You’re just asking the right person.
Need help turning dating burnout into self-worth clarity?
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